I’m all for clarifying intentions — you would be wise to know mine.
Regardless of what landed this particular email in your inbox — you should know what’s about to happen. I’m offering you a way out of this relationship.
I once wrote an article about the obvious similarities between sex and conversion.
The internet is the bar.
Your website is your house.
Your email list is your bedroom.
Customer acquisition is… you get the picture.
You’re in my bedroom right now, we’re lying on the bed staring longingly into each other’s eyes, and I’m asking you straight up… are you here to cuddle or fuck?
I’m not saying I don’t value foreplay, I do. The way I see it — we matched up online, you reached out to express interest, and we’re thinking we like each other.
Why wouldn’t we talk regularly? Fuck the “hard to get” bullshit, I’m just going to be me and if you don’t like that — we weren’t meant to be together in the first place.
So every day from this moment on I’m going send you an email — it may be a sentence, it may be a story. I’ll tell you what I’m thinking and you can tell me what you’re thinking. This relationship we have will be like… interactive n’ shit.
If you aren’t feeling it anymore, you can end it. I’ll even give you an eject button. Even if you choose not to use it today, I’ll include it in the footer of every email — just in case.